Tuesday, January 5, 2010

A Housewife's Forced Happiness

Peonies








Last night, with my teenagers, was very difficult. There were so many things going on, and I could not get my bearings. I felt like I was being pulled in all different directions. I had no peace.

It is so easy for Mothers to get stressed out. It is easy for us to get upset. There is just so much in life to irritate and annoy us. But we have to find a way to "force happiness." With these actions, slowly the feelings will follow and peace will come.

This morning, I am trying to make sense of it all. (How does one stay cheerful, in the midst of misery?) I realize that I have to have some sense of order. I have to remain calm and peaceful. I will try to make it better.

My father, who is a very godly man, reads his Bible, listens to sermons and gospel music, quite frequently. When you walk into his home, you can see and sense the prevailing mood of his life. He also listens to gospel in the car. If his grandchildren are there with him, he does not let them listen to their worldly music. No, it is his domain. He will not do those things "to be nice." Perhaps because it may destroy his peace.

This is what I have let go, these past few days. My children have been using my computer throughout the day and it has taken away some of my "domain." I usually have gospel music playing on my computer, while I sit nearby and read. Or while I am cleaning, everything is quiet, except the sweet melody from my computer. I have let the children use it (too much) "to be nice." This was my mistake, because it has started to destroy me. While they can use it, at times; It can only be at specific, short intervals. I will have to change that and get my house back in order.

Today, I am going to make a nice supper - beef stew. I will also take my time cleaning while listening to precious gospel music.

I will read and enjoy a quiet day. I am going to keep the children very busy with school assignments.

I am going to read my Bible and sing hymns until my normal, happy mood comes back. Usually, if the children are bothering me, in the car, I will turn on the Christian radio station and tell them I need to heal. I listen to that for awhile, and then I am okay again. It is like the children's conversations and actions freeze, while the gospel music is playing (like I am in another world), and then when I have gotten enough spiritual nourishment, I am stronger and can handle their normal irritations (their childish sin natures).

The fact is, I had gotten out of sorts. I was not able to do the daily acts of worship to help my heart and soul stay cheerful through it all. It was something I had allowed to slip, yesterday. I had, somehow, forgotten my source of strength.

My house has to be a godly house, no matter what my worldly teenagers want! A mother must take control of this. The Mother must be the sweet and godly soul who keeps the home full of sunshine, even when storms are all around her.

I pray the Lord helps me never to forget again!


Blessings
Mrs. White

6 comments:

Deanna said...

God Bless you.
Being a mom isn't always the easiest position to have, but a very worthy and valuable one.

I'm patting you on the back and cheering you on!

d

The Machinist's Wife said...

This is absolutely true! We cannot allow our guard to slip, even though we seem to be accommodating our children. We truly need to guard the home.

Janet said...

Thank you for your honesty, Mrs. White. Your openess will help some of us not make the same mistakes, or help us know how to handle problems better.

Michelle said...

Thank you for this insightful post. Although listening to gospel music is not such a center of my day, I do meditate on Scriptures and pray. For me, that is more how I contemplate God and walk with Him. It is so very important, though, and without remaining focused on Him it is easy for the mother to become impatient or irritated.

Vivianna said...

Dear Mrs. White,

I do appreciate your transparency. Our 22 year old son is not walking with the Lord. He grew up in a christian home. His heart's bent always seemed to go against what God required of him... obedience to God's word, honor mother and father, obey parents, etc., At the time, I was a very young mother. My husband worked from 4pm -12am. So he did not spend much time with our son during the week. So I would be in charge. I tried to become a "friend" to my son. As he grew older in his early teens, he lost respect for me and all the things that were compromised for the sake of "friendship" and "peace" were taken for granted. Needless to say, our home was a "hell" for about 5 years because I compromised what I knew we shouldn't have. God needs to be honored above all no matter what the cost. Teenagers do not rule the home. And it is extremely important for the mother and father to "be on the same page". Once the teens are older, they will realize how selfish, uncaring and ungodly they were. And realize that mom and dad did not compromise what they believed in. They will have more respect for you as parents than if you do compromise....

Just some thoughts.

Woman Living by Grace said...

Thank you for this post. I too have a house full of teenagers.They are between the ages of 16 & 13 years old.I know what it's like to be "out of sorts" with them sometimes. I am encouraged to stay the path!!

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