Monday, August 15, 2011

Titus 2 Series: Being Obedient to Your Husband

Signing the Register
[Introductory Message:

   "Today, six friends and I are writing a series based on the biblical principles taken from Titus 2:3-5. We pray that the topics discussed will inspire and encourage you to draw closer to God and His plan for womanhood." The following is my part of the conversation.]
 Being Obedient to Your Husband

A traditional wedding vow, for a woman, always included the following words:

". . . to Love, Honor and Obey, until Death do us Part."

This was her contract. She was not only promising to Love and Honor her husband, she was promising to Obey him.

It was important that she carefully choose a man who she believed in. She was cautious about the man she agreed to marry. In the old days, there were no easy divorces. As a matter of fact, they were very rare. People took their 'word' or their Promise very seriously. 

You've heard the old songs, encouraging women:

"Stand by your man."  and  "Follow him wherever he may go."

The woman was the helper. She was to follow His vision for the family and for her life.

A startling thought from the Bible is in Genesis, where God tells Eve that her husband will be her leader. Scripture says the husband is to rule over his wife.   He is like her King.   We also see this solemn fact in the book of Esther. The King had sent out a decree:

"For he sent letters into all the king's provinces. . . that every man should bear rule in his own house. . ."

We are surrounded by worldly examples and it is hard to get our bearings. Modern wedding vows are written by couples themselves, rather than going by the standard contract. Some women are even boldly refusing to marry unless the word "Obey" is removed from the ceremony. These are the times in which we live. But we must remember that those are worldly, not Biblical, thoughts. We have to stand fast and follow the old paths.

You may wonder how to obey?  Today's women are finding it harder and harder.  But think on this:

Has your precious child ever broken your favorite glass? Have you gotten angry? Or did you let it go.

Has someone interrupted your day, making it hard to follow your scheduled plans? How have you responded?

Do you see that slowly our own will is being broken down? Do you see that our attachments to material things and our control of our lives changes? We learn, through these trials, how to yield.

One of the greatest things you can do in marriage is yield to your husband's plans. He will love and cherish and trust you, if you learn to follow that sacred marriage promise - to obey.

To encourage you, find old books or movies where old fashioned marriage is portrayed. One of my favorite books, which has been called by some as a "marriage manual' was written as a beautiful novel in the 1800's. It is called, Aunt Jane's Hero, written by Elizabeth Prentiss.  It is one of the sweetest books you'll ever read.

I do want to warn you. Many have scoffed and questioned the wisdom of obedience. They give the "what if" scenarios. Such as - "what if my husband wanted me to do wrong?" We can go on and on about that for hours. But the simple fact is, in most homes, these "what ifs" are not the case. We have to learn to give up the power of control, independence, self-centeredness, and self-righteousness. We have to learn to trust, depend, and serve. When thinking about obedience, think about lovingly following the guidance and plans of your husband, and you will do well.

Isn't it fascinating that this little "trial" of obedience (amidst the daily acts of life) train and discipline us for obeying the will of our Heavenly Father?  I will tell you this - the reward is greater than we can ever imagine.  But I will give you a little glimpse - peace, joy, contentment, meekness. . .and a sweet- tempered soul. . almost angelic. . . It is then that the light will shine through us to warm and comfort those around us.

Mrs. White

Titus 2 Series Writers:

["Please join the following ladies as they share their hearts with you."]

June Fuentes at A Wise Woman Builds Her Home
Being Sober

Jasmine at Far Above Rubies
Keeper at Home

Heather at Raising Mighty Arrows
Being Discreet

Hannah at Cultivating Home
Loving Your Children

Mrs. Sharon White at The Legacy of Home
Being Obedient to Your Husband

Caroline at The Modest Mom
Being Chaste

Esther at Simple Country Life
Loving Your Husbands

An Invitation - Subscribe to The Legacy of Home and have it delivered directly to your email.



Far Above Rubies said...

Mrs. White, thank you so much. I'm encouraged to stand firm and obey my husband. It does bring such peace and sweet joy into the home.



Praises from a Wife and Mommy! said...

Great Post! Thank you!

Raising Mighty Arrows said...

Great post! Thank you for sharing. :)

Taryn said...

This is one reason I didn't like the Little House books. The words-to obey-were taken out of the marriage vows. A discussion of this is at articles/book reviews. The marriage vows are when the marriage begins. We need to tell our children the importance of those words/vows. The God of the Bible takes them seriously. It is comforting to know that we don't have to make all the final decisions.

Mrs Mary Joy Pershing said...

interesting approach...
we are actually doing a series on the topic of surrendering to God and submitting in marriage. My husband wrote the article for today about the definition of Biblical Submission
and surrender.

Its interesting to read different thoughts on the subject.


Mrs Mary Joy Pershing

ginger said...

Amen! Thank you!

Taryn said...

This post reminded me of the book, The Way Home by Mary Pride( the hyphen) especially chapter 2- Beyond the "Me" Marriage. The subtitle of the book is Beyond Feminism Back to Reality.

Bonni said...

Interesting post! I enjoy visiting your blog!

Anonymous said...

But what should you do if your husband is asking you to do something unGodly, something that breaks the 10 Commandments?

It happens far more often than you think. Just because it doesn't happen in your house doesn't mean it's rare.

It's important to address this issue, not just say "It hardly ever happens."

To me, obedience to our husbands is imporant, but not as important as obedience to God. My husband is not God. It is my duty to follow the 10 Commandments first.

Taryn said...

Of course,obedience to God is first. There are so many Scriptures for this. Years ago, I knew a Christian woman who was told by her husband to write out a bad check. She did it, ended up in prison(she was "with child"-Matthew 1 KJ) and her children in foster care. It goes even furthur than the 10 commandments-intimacy in marriage as mentioned in the Duggar's book,etc. the right) and Mary Pride's books address these issues. Amos 3:3(KJ)-there are so many things we need to be in agreement about. But when my husband said we should move to another state, years ago-we moved-instead of me ending the marriage over it. We had 3 more children after that. Seven years later we moved back and our 3 older sons met their wives.

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