Tuesday, June 26, 2012

The Painful Years of Motherhood

Waiting on the Verandah

One of the hardest things to do, as a Mother, is to watch your grown children out in the world. You hear about their trials and their struggles and you beg them to come home. . .

I have two adult children who live in the city.  They have done great things and are doing well. But every so often, over the years, terrible things happen and it breaks my heart. I want to save them. I want to have them home again, and for them to start over, and not leave until they feel ready.  But it is not for me to say. . .

When the worst of stories come, and the tears fall, I pray myself to sleep.  . . I read my Bible for comfort and I wait. . .

They know they are welcome here with us. They know they have a place to come home to. But they are still struggling through things I cannot stop.   Sometimes, I devise plans and say, "Well, you can have your old room back and we will do all the old fun things and it will be wonderful."  I am sure they sigh. I know it sounds good for a visit, but not to live back as a child.  An adult can never go back to those safe, secure years of living with Mother and Dad.  Still, I keep offering.

I realize these occasional heartaches are rare.  I realize that most of the time, they are fine and doing well.  Just like real life.  There are good times and horrible times.  None of us can predict trouble. We can't make life all rosy and sweet.  It is impossible.  Rough days will come. And even though it rends mother's heart with sorrow, we cannot take on the burden.  We give it to Him who knows all things.  We say, "Lord, take care of our children.  Lord, they are having trouble right now. You are in charge of them. Watch. . . and Guard. . . and protect them. . .  and get us all through this."

So I sit here at the estate. I sit on the porch or by the window and I wait for the day when they will come home.  The day they say, "I've had enough of the world and I want to start over."

 Someday, I will see them walk down the lane. Perhaps it is to come home for good. Or maybe it is to tell me they have found a better path and all is wonderful.  Whatever the case may be, tears of joy and relief will fall.  And those painful years will fade away as a distant memory.

Mrs. White

For those sad times of Motherhood - Childhood Home as the Nursery.

Quiet occupations - How a Housewife Passes the Time.

A Picture of my Children when they were Little - Suppertime with Precious Helpers.

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Janette@Janette's Sage said...

Oh I can so relate to this, having four adult children, and two still home. I think this stage of parenting has been more emotionally challenging than all the other years...yet, it has also been the years my prayer life has grown the most.

Watching my son and daughter-in-law go through infertility has really been a challenge...God is faithful to them as He has been to us.

Anonymous said...

I find your blog encouraging as many bloggers seem to have young children and an idealized view of how things will be when their children grow older. It is refreshing to see honesty in regards to how life is when your children are young adults and the struggles we as mothers go through when dealing with them. Our children go out into the world and encounter all types of people whose upbringing and values may be very differnt from ours. Sadly, that influence seems at times to be very strong and it is easy to despair. The end result does seem to be more prayers and tears for mother. God bless you, Mrs. White.

Cathy said...

Mrs. White, The Lord knows how to bring each of us, including our children, to a place of crying out to Him. He is a loving Father. Psalm 107 has been a great comfort to me. I'm praying with you.

Lori said...

As a fellow mom who also has 2 grown children and 4 still at home, I am praying and crying with you. What has helped me is actually picturing releasing those grown ones to the Lord's care. There is nothing more to do. They know we love them and God loves them even more. Blessings to you!

fanta4two said...

Funny, I clicked on your link from WLW linkup and I was thinking, oh from that title she will for SURE talk about the days of infancy and toddlerhood. Imagine my surprise to find this writeup!

I'm a new mom (my oldest is 4 years old)...and well, I guess its just hard in different ways.

I also suppose every stage has its beautiful facets and for now, I'm going to continue to do my best to enjoy the fact that they are home and I'm their hero :)

My mother in law once said, the only way you'll ever get through motherhood is with lots of prayer for wisdom. That's the reason why God made you a mother (she is a mother of 4). And I still think she's right.

God bless you sister.
-Patty from www.fanta4two.com

AsSnugAsABug said...

My daughter is sleeping next to me, so I'm vertainly in a different place to you. However, the love and care for your children shines through your post like a warm sunrise.

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