Tuesday, February 21, 2023

A Day in the Life of a Housewife

"A Country Home" by Frederic Edwin Church (1826 - 1900).


Things are very quiet in the rural mountains of Vermont.  The winter keeps us mostly indoors. There is not a great deal of activity at this time of year.  On days when we do not have much company, there is less to do.  My grown children and grandchildren are my most frequent visitors, but not quite as often during cold winter days.

When things are this quiet, I tend to think about what it may have been like for homesteaders in the old days. I remember the homemakers who lived out in rural areas and were confined to the family residence with chores and the maintenance of home as the main occupation. 

 It is a blessing to be at home. Yet, sometimes I wonder, am I doing enough? I have been struggling with health difficulties for nearly four months now, since I was in the hospital in early November of last year.  Things have changed so drastically for me and I am finding myself less able to do the work and activity as before.  This makes me wonder, on very rough days, am I useless?  Yesterday was one of those days. Because of this, I thought it best to write out what I actually did on that day. It is a sort of diary of a housewife.  This, I am hoping, will show me that even though I have serious limits, what I did was certainly good enough.  If you ever have one of those days, I hope you find encouragement here.

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The activity of the day:

Walked

In the quiet of the morning, at about 6 a.m., I walked for 35 minutes. I do this by pacing the floors at a steady rate.  When I first begin, I do my devotions as I go.  While I am walking I read portions of the Bible, a page from a hymn book, and then daily readings from two devotional books.  This daily walk is essential for helping to maintain my health. The devotions are an incredibly comforting way to start the day.

Chores

I made my bed and made sure my room looked neat. 

Research

I spent about an hour doing research for a book project I am working on.  

Reading

It was time for a little rest. I read several pages of an interesting book.  

Laundry

I did a load of laundry. I also checked on it during the day. When it was finished, in late afternoon, I folded it all and put it away.

Bookkeeping

I took the receipts from my purse and recorded the entries in my financial journal. I then got out my bank books and recorded any checks I had written or debit transactions since the last time I did this. 

Chores

I had an idea since I woke up that I wanted to dust and vacuum the living room. It took me a long time to feel that I had enough energy. First I had to empty and clean the vacuum since I last used it.  A repair was necessary and for this I was grateful that my husband fixed the problem.  While I was waiting, I emptied the children's toy baskets. I tossed any trash or broken items. Then I found little containers to sort and store puzzle pieces, tiny cars, and other treasures.  Everything is now neat and inviting and ready for when the grandchildren visit.  I also swept the floor under the baskets. 

I was starting to feel a great deal of pain. One of the family reminded me that everything does not need to be done in a day. Unfortunately I did not listen. I kept saying, "I just want to finish this one project." By the time I finished with the toy baskets, I was in no condition to vacuum the carpets.  I had to go rest.  After a short time, I went back and did some of the dusting. But I could not do any more. That is when the feeling of being useless came over me. I went straight to bed feeling extremely fatigued and in pain.

The comfort of hymns

When we are feeling discouraged, my husband and I will start quietly singing "Amazing Grace."  He started doing this to cheer me up when I was feeling down. It is heartwarming to hear him sing this to me.  Often I will join in and sing along with him. It always helps us to refocus on what really matters.  We are most joyful when we keep our thoughts and focus on our Heavenly Father who loves us dearly. He guides our actions and blesses us with peace and provision. The hymns help make things better.

Visits with the Family

I talked to two of my grown children on the telephone. This is so comforting to all of us. We share advice, talk about our days, and I always enjoy hearing what my beloved grandchildren are doing.  As I was resting, propped up with pillows, my grown sons stepped in to talk and visit with me.  And, of course, my husband checked on me frequently to see if I needed anything. 

Evening Devotions

My husband and I have our Bible time each night.  We read Scripture and sing hymns. This is a favorite part of our day.

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Looking over my activity, I still feel that I did not do very much.  But I must realize that life is not always about what we can accomplish. It is about being here. It is about creating a home where we can rest and feel safe and loved. It is about the blessing of family and the gratefulness I feel to be a child of God. 

Life is not about a focus on myself. It is not about having ambitions. It is not what I can do because I have learned by hard lessons that I can do nothing without my precious Lord. I am helpless and flawed and need my dear Lord to guide and strengthen me. 

This time of illness and inactivity is a reminder that the whole duty of my life is to keep looking up in my thoughts and prayers, and know that every single day I get to be here is an incredible gift. I will not waste it in thoughts of discouragement. I will be cheerful, joyful, and at peace even if much of my time is spent resting. In all this, I am grateful.

 

Blessings

Mrs. White

From the Archives -

What Many of us Crave - An Ordinary Life at Home.

Finding Genuine Happiness at Home - Peace be Upon This House.  

Careful thrift in the Home - Reducing Expenses.

 

 - To find out more about this blog, or Mrs. White, please visit our About page. -


Mrs. White's detailed explanation of keeping a financial journal and budget:

 

For old time encouragement in living simply on a limited income, order Mrs. White's book:

"An Old Fashioned Budget: Humble Financial Management for the Christian Housewife"

This slim, 77 page, paperback book is available for sale through Amazon.

 




20 comments:

Marsha Harrup said...

PRAYING for you dear one! Getting older puts limits on us. I can attest to that one.
PRAYING God will give you the strength that you need for each day! Blessings upon Blessings to you and your precious family.

Homemaker'sThoughts.blogspot.com said...

Thank you, Mrs. White, for this lovely post. I think we all tend to get down when we feel we no longer have that physical ability as when we were young(er). I know I do! And I, too, have wondered if I'm making any difference by being at home and doing what I'm doing. But, I'm reassured that even those "little" things that we get done are important and realize that I don't have to do everything in one day like you had said. I totally could relate to all you wrote about and I doubt if there is a homemaker, both past and present, who hasn't felt that way too. We can encourage each other in this and with what I just read, it sounds like you DID accomplish quite a bit! God bless your day and week ahead. : )

Kathy Jackson said...

I’m so sorry that you’re feeling bad, but so glad for your reminders of what’s truly important. ❤️

Glenda said...

I, too, have a chronic painful condition. Your words really struck home with me, as I feel useless, at times, also. My husband is a big support in encouraging me to realize it isn't what I do, but who I am that is important.
I think for those of us who want to accomplish as much as we used to do, slowing down is frustrating. We are in our 70's and slowing down is realistic, but still difficult. God is teaching me acceptance and patience with myself.
Prayer is the answer in all things. I have learned that when I simply can't push myself to do more, I can pray more. It is a blessed time of prayer for all of my loved ones, our community and our messed up world. I have my regular prayer times throughout the day, but special times when surrendering to God's will for me are precious.
Thank you for this article. It blessed me very much. I pray that you continue to heal.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for writing this! It is very encouraging during this time when it seems like so many are suffering in one way or another. The Lord Jesus is our refuge and strength. I find that prayer is a huge part of my occupation as a homemaker...especially now! Fixing our eyes on Jesus and our thoughts on the truths from the Word of God is so comforting. Soon we shall see Him face to face...Maranatha! Linn (my children are grown and I homeschooled them :)).

Vee said...

That was an excellent idea to write down all that you did. You actually accomplished a lot and, obviously, overdid it some. Hope that you are feeling much better today.

"Pace Yourself" is one of my advisements as I, too, must take it slow. I try not to compare my older self with my younger self.

Singing hymns is a great comfort...I find myself humming "He's never failed me yet..."

Finished reading "Born to Serve" yesterday. It was far different from what I expected, though I find myself thinking about its theme.

Deanna said...

Blessings to you! God's comfort to you. I always enjoy reading your blog. I am in a similar boat about health issues. It is a challenge some days to simply sit in my chair.

Homemaker's Heart said...

Hello Mrs White,

I read through your list and was very impressed with how much you did. In years past I have had the same thoughts - I didn't do enough. The Lord has had me on a journey to learn for me 'what is enough', how do I define that. Do I go to bed each night looking back at all I didn't do and start the next day with an impossible list. If I do, then by mid day I am on the down side of my day and I only see all I haven't gotten done.

Now I ask - 'Lord, what are the 2 most important things YOU want me to do today' and those 2 that come to mind are my goal. Other than being present to my husband, Loving as He loves me to those who I cross paths with each day, I try to get my 2 things done. The rest is bonus.

He has you on a journey. Maybe yours is some sort of acceptance as well, I don't know. But you are doing a great job.

Just my experience.
Blessings, Dee

Marilyn said...

Seems as we get older it takes us longer and longer to do things. My home has been getting cleaned in spurts. I have been going to a chiropractor 3 times a week, trying to get this 78 year old body able to do my chores better. I have found I have become more efficient in what I do though. I have found easier ways to accomplish the same tasks. I only hope as garden season approaches, I will be able to get out there. During my "rest" periods I might be dong some sewing, or writing letters or doing my paperwork. Pain often makes me restless at night and I have long talks with the Lord during those times. Yes hymns are so encouraging. I often read notes that I have taken during the past Sunday's sermon. I rewrite the notes in a notebook just for the purpose of rereading them.
Your husband is a precious gift from God. I think your blog is so encouraging and it feels like a chat with a life long friend. Thank you.

Andrea G. said...

Hello Mrs. White,
As always, this has been a timely, helpful and much appreciated post. I get so excited when I see a notification of a new post from you. I’m sorry to hear you haven’t been well. I imagine your situation must be very frustrating, but I am inspired by your outlook.
I don’t know if people ever make requests, I hope I’m not rude in asking and I understand if it’s not possible, but I would love to read a post with some wisdom on how you handled a houseful of sick children. I have four of my own, and we have had one illness after another after another for months. I know all the practical tips about Tylenol and bland food, but would like to know how to keep my chin up and keep a good attitude. How did you make it through or do you have any practical advice? I thought this past illness was going to make me go crazy-we we’re just all recovering from Covid and then a stomach bug hit. I figured with all your experience with a big family you may have some memories and practical advice to share. If not possible, I totally understand.
Again, thank you for another great post. You’re in my prayers.

Ashley said...

Thank you for sharing this today! I have lived with limited ability due to health conditions for a long time now, and have grown significantly more limited in the past year. It is easy to feel like I am the "only one" who can't do all that I would like to, or feel like I should. Your post encouraged me that I am not alone. :)
I have been reading a very helpful book called Chronic Illness - Walking by Faith by Esther Smith. A line from that book has been a good reminder for me on days when I can do very little... "If all that you ever do, all the days of your earthly life, is to walk with God, then that is a life worth living. That is a life worthy of being recorded and remembered for generations to come."
I hope these words can be encouraging to you as well!

Snow princess said...

Thank you, Mr. Sharon White, for your beautiful sentiments about life and its many trials and joys. You are such a remarkable woman of our Lord and God. Praying for your recovery🙏🏻

SIRVIENDO AL SEÑOR said...

DEAR SHARON: ME SIENTO IDENTIFICADA CON TUS PALABRAS, AUNQUE YO NO TENGO ENFERMEDAD ALGUNA, TAMBIEN ME CANSO MUCHO, TENGO VARIOS HIJOS Y 3 SON DISCAPACITADOS Y ABSORBEN GRAN PARTE DE MI DIA, LOS AMO Y TRATO DE HACER LO MEJOR PARA ELLOS, PERO A VECES SIENTO QUE NO ALCANZA Y ME EXIJO Y DESPUES ME SIENTO IRRITADA POR EL CANSANCIO ¿A TI NO TE PASA? CREO QUE NO DEBEMOS EXIGIRNOS TANTO, ¿A QUIEN DEBEMOS RENDIR CUENTAS? ¿SI HOY LIMPIO O NO QUIEN VA A DECIR ALGO? YA SOMOS GRANDES, TENGO 63 AÑOS Y MI ESPOSO 67 AÑOS, SIENTO QUE YA NO SOY TAN ACTIVA COMO ANTES, HAGO LAS COSAS QUE DEBO HACER, PERO ME TOMO UN DESCANSO, ME GUSTA MUCHO TEJER, BORDAR Y COSER Y EN ELLO ENCUENTRO UN RATO DE ESPARCIMIENTO Y RELAX. ¿QUE ENFERMEDAD TIENES? HACE AÑOS QUE LEO TU BLOG Y NUNCA LEI SOBRE TU DOLENCIA, ESTARE ORANDO POR ESO. BENDICIONES DESDE BUENOS AIRES.

Brenda said...

You are not useless!! I am glad that you see that as well. Be sure to pace yourself and definitely get some rest in there somewhere! You are a blessing to many and I am glad to be able to hear how you are doing in the midst of it all. You have encouraged me as well. I have some days that I feel that way. We can still make a difference, even in our "off" days. Sending blessings to you, Mrs. White!

Sincerely,
Mrs. Smith
TN

Patty B said...

Not to worry about having a day with feelings of no accomplishments. I think those of us who live in the northern regions and have long winters feel this way often. I have many days like this, due to age (I'm well into my 70's), arthritis, and leg problems (I need knee replacements in both knees). Every day I ask our Lord to guide me in the paths of His will. Some days I know He just wants me to rest. When spring comes it seems like I suddenly have more energy! Winters can be very hard.

carol said...

Please, Mrs. White - rest and recuperate - your articles and books have so blessed me and I crave more! God bless you and keep you.

stephanie said...


My poor, dear Mrs. White. I am so sorry that you have been in the hospital and still not feeling well.You do so much more than you realize. Good for you for writing down what you have done during the day. I am so thrilled that someone who is ill can do so much. You have always meant so much to me. I love reading your posts and books. Right now I am reading, The Home at Greylock." I just read the part where Mrs Grey went to visit mr and mrs thayer to give advice regarding their children. I also have been suffering with an illness...unlike your sweet manner of handling illness, i get angry. i have pains, but doctors have not been able to figure out the problem. i feel frustrated and guilty when i don't know how to plan for the coming day. will i feel well and be able to proceed with planned activities or not if a flare up? but you have always inspired me with your Godliness and patience. whereas, i can be a proper whiner. i received the two pfizer shots and realize through research what a mistake this was for me and have asked God for forgiveness. many people are becoming ill now. but all i can do is pray for peace. thank you always for your encouragement in my life.

Linda said...

Dear Mrs White, I was so sorry to read that your still unwell. It must be very hard to have a lingering illness. I know you like to care for your husband and your home, plus be a lovely Nana to your grandchildren. I can imagine how difficult it must be to not have the energy you need. It's inspiring that you are able to still find joy in your suffering. What a testimony ! Please know that I will be lifting you in prayer, that what you are going through will be only for a season, and that you will regain your health and vitality soon. Your very dear to all of us and your blog and writing is a treasure. Blessings to you ~ Linda

Mrs. White said...

I am so grateful for all these encouraging comments and prayers. It is amazing to see that so many others go through the same things. It is good to be reminded that these types of days are normal. Thank you to all for the very uplifting thoughts!

A special note to Andrea G: I am thankful for your request. Requests are welcome and appreciated! I will work on a post in the next couple of days. I hope you and your children feel better soon!

With love from Mrs. White

Amelia said...

Hi Mrs. White, I know how you feel...So sorry to be late in commenting but I've been ill lately with a severe cold and dealing with an elderly mom who can be tightly wound.

It sounds like you are very strong dear one, you do a lot, more than probably what I can do on a normal day. I have a delicate system myself so I know how it is...

We must remember "This one thing" and that is to sit at the feet of Jesus...

I hope you are feeling stronger this week, it's so very nice you were able to talk with your children over the phone,it's hard at our age sometimes, we're worn out and are in dire need of fellowship on certain days but we don't want to bother our grown children taking care of toddlers and we oursleves are busy just doing the basics, maybe suffering from a sore throat from allergies or cold...Cooking and washing the clothes.

I'll be lifting you up in prayer and I'm so enjoying that book still, I lost my place and am re-reading it and love it.

Do you know how much good you do dear one?

Be encouraged, I appreciate you greatly.

Love, Amelia