Tuesday, May 10, 2011
In the old days, Mothers used to hold a special place in the home for Fathers. The children were taught not to sit in his chair. They were taught to serve him first. They were taught to respect their Father as the head of the home.
But somewhere along the way, Mothers became more independent. No longer would they be like Edith Bunker, who did everything for her husband, during the height of the women's lib movement.
I like to think I take good care of Mr. White. I like to think I am a good wife. But yesterday I noticed something had been forgotten. I noticed him on edge and unhappy. I realized it was my fault.
I had been talking too much about the children's problems. I had been discussing money and bills. While these conversations have their place, it should not be the all-consuming - day-in-day-out focus of our home life.
When I realized this was happening, I remembered the old farm wives who used to make large meals and feed their weary husbands. They worked tirelessly for the comfort of their men - the providers.
I remembered sweet women, who were wives of great ministers - like Mrs. John R. Rice. I thought of her favorite book, which I have read numerous times. It was something she kept by her bedside and loved dearly. It was called, "God's Ideal Woman," and was written in 1941. Mrs. Rice wrote the foreword for this book. Then I thought of another amazing book, from the same publisher, called, "Beautiful for Thee." This one was published in the 1970's. Ladies, these kinds of books were written before Women's Lib changed a culture. These old books teach us how to be good wives and mothers.
As I thought about these books, I knew what I had to do to cheer up my husband. I asked him if he was comfortable and I resolved to be silent. . .
I would be meek and submissive and concern myself only with the moment, and Mr. White's happiness here at home. This must be a place of refuge for him. It must be a place of peace and rest. So I went into the kitchen and made a delicious supper. Then we both sat together and quietly read the newspaper. I kept all my opinions and thoughts to myself. I had to learn the art of silence. I had to learn that my husband needed quiet so he could recover from his own worries.
I think Mrs. Bunker had it right all along. She wanted to make sure Archie had his meals and his coffee and his special chair. She created a home for him, a place he wanted to be, despite the feministic pull of the world. She created a place where she served him with love and devotion, and did her very best not to cause him any additional worries.
Inspired to work hard - What I Learned from My Husband's Weariness.
I Need to be Here - The Home Must Be Occupied.
A Little Visit - A Cozy Morning at the White House.
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